We All Have This Problem and We Need To Change

You’re hanging out with your friends in some social setting. It’s a Friday night. Scratch that. You’re actually out and about having lunch with some friends, sipping on some wine or a beer. Whatever your poison is. As you run through the formalities, conversation starts to get a bit dull as you relive memories of shit you did back in high school or even last week. As the conversation sways from person to person… it happens…


One of your friends, or you for that matter, starts talking about someone else in a negative light. This is probably one of the worst things you can do as a human being. Not only is it a waste of time but you’re talking about other people in a bad light is really just a reflection of your own insecurities.

It’s okay.. you can own up to it. We’ve all been there. We’ve all said some shit about someone we don’t like. It could have been one of our family members, teachers, work associates, or even about a friend. Even if you have a good reason to talk trash – don’t.

I read a quote, you may have seen it online before, it says: “Holding onto anger is like drinking poison and expecting the other person to die.” Same thing goes for saying negative things towards others in public or in private settings. You’re only drinking more of your insecure ass poison.

Here’s another awesome quote that fits well.

Great minds discuss ideas; average minds discuss events; small minds discuss people.

I have absolutely no idea who quoted it but does it really matter?

Ask yourself, ‘am I discussing ideas, events, or people?’ The more quality questions you ask yourself, the better quality of life you’ll have. Not because of some law of attraction stuff but because you’ll start to learn more about yourself and stretch your mind to find solutions.

Your brain WANTS to find solutions. It doesn’t want to be stupid. It doesn’t want to remain dull. It wants to thrive. What keeps you from digging this deep is your ego! That’s an entirely separate topic within itself.

Remember Perez Hilton?

You know, that celebrity gossiper dude who essentially got famous by talking shit and hating on other celebrities publicly on his blog? Well the former shit-talker/douche-bag/pubic gossiper decided that enough was enough.

Watch this short clip of Perez on Ellen. He explains exactly how he was justifying his actions. It just may shed some light on how you’re justifying your own.

What once gave him fulfillment, no longer did. He got inspired by something bigger than his ego and that was to stop bullying by leading by example.

People who constantly gossip, talk shit on other people, are merely reflecting their lack of fulfillment within themselves. They’re taking the easy road by giving out their negative opinions of others.

Fuck people like that.

Don’t be that person.

Be the person that inspires their friends and family. Be that person who compliments strangers and acts crazy in public. Be who the fuck you are. And if you don’t like something about yourself, that’s ok! Hell, sometimes I don’t like shit about myself either!

But I choose to focus on my strengths. I choose to focus on what I am good at. And I choose to focus on just doing what the fuck makes me happy. Do what the fuck makes you happy and you’ll live an amazing life.

By no means am I perfect and I know you aren’t either. We’re all human, unless for some strange reason you’re a dog reading this article. That would be pretty awesome.

In summary: become aware of your thoughts before they turn into words of negativity towards someone else.

– Chris Altamirano

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