Cutting People Out Of Your Life Will Help Your Growth

If you’re anything like me, you want growth. Spiritually, mentally, physically and more importantly–emotionally. Unfortunately, the world we live in tends to breed individuals who are too caught up in themselves to be self-aware of this thing we call life. Maybe you’ve been having poor friendships or dedicated years to a toxic relationship. Whatever the case, the reality is this: if you want to grow some people have to go. Cutting people out of your life can be difficult because they have filled some sort of role in your life, but if you’re as serious as you think you are, you have to grab the metaphorical axe of progress and start the chopping.

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Cutting People Out of Your Life: The Decision

Whatever voice you have in your heart that is telling you to distance yourself from certain people, often times those we care about, is what we popularly refer to as our intuition. Now your intuition is going to be 100% transparent with you at all times. It isn’t going to lie or sugar coat the truth to make yourself feel better. It’s telling you that you need to make the choice of reason, to travel to the path of most resistance so that you can mold yourself into the gem that you’re meant to be.

Think of it like this: your life is like a seed. You get planted in the dirt (life) and before you can reach the surface and sprout into a sapling, you have to go through all of the soil and push through (people in your life dragging you down) before you can reach the surface and see the light, otherwise known as your progress or better self. You have to go through some low quality people. It’s just the way it is.

The decision you have to make is a tough one. You will want to talk yourself out of it a lot of times but your intuition will slap you in the face and check you straight. Deep down you already know your reasons for wanting to cut a certain person(s) out of your life, so stick with it and know that everything is going to get better.

How To Cut People Out of Your Life

Once you’ve made the decision to cut people out of your life, the next thing that needs to happen is actually following through with your decision. It doesn’t make sense to say you want change and then not change. But that’s the thing about human beings, I mean you hear it every year during the holidays, “I’m going to lose weight. Starting January 1st!”

It’s all bullshit. People who really want to change will change. They won’t wait for some date, time, or place to dictate their decision making. They just make it happen. Unfortunately for most people, change requires growth and everyone wants change but no one wants to change! They don’t even want the people around them to change, yet want their circumstances to be better. Is this making sense to you? If so, great. You actually have a brain and are self-aware of the fact that you’re going to have to change.

Now cutting people out of your life doesn’t mean you go up to someone and bluntly say, “yo, you’re no good for my life. I was reading this article on ChrisAltamirano.com and Chris was saying that if I want growth, I can’t surround myself with low-quality people, so I’m cutting you out of my life.” No, no, no. Do not say that. Although that would be hilarious, it would be very hurtful. In this case, silence is absolutely golden. It’s better to let your absence be felt than to notify someone that you’re going to be absent.

Slowly remove yourself from specific social settings and from certain people’s lives. If you’re in a relationship, you can be more blunt about how something isn’t working out. But the same actions apply. You must slowly remove yourself from all contact and from all social settings where these low-quality people reside to ensure that the mental and physical distance is being made.

What To Expect

Remember what I said about change? This is where the going gets tough and why most people say they want change but do not want to change. Growth means you have to go through some stuff. Mentally, emotionally, and spiritually it is going to be a battle. When you’re home on a Friday or Saturday night, seeing all of your old people out having fun through photos on social media, you’re most definitely going to question your decision.

You’ll ask yourself questions or say things like:

“Is this the right choice?”

“They aren’t that bad, maybe I should reach out.”

“This is just a phase I’m going through, right?”

“It’s not them that needs to change, it’s me!”

Stick to your decision! Don’t believe me? Go ahead and go back on your decision and you’ll see what I’m talking about. Your intuition will not let you off the hook. It will get mad at you and say things like, “what are you doing?!” or “are these really the people who are going to help you become the best version you can possibly be?” And you’ll kick yourself in the ass. Commit and don’t quit!

You are going to be lonely at times, but that’s a part of the process. It’s in times like these that you’re going to want to hang out with the people that you do want to be like: your mentors!

These people will come in the forms of TedTalks, great books, or just some awesome YouTube video that you find that inspires you to think differently about the way you see life.

New People Begin To Attract

You won’t be lonely for long and your only friends won’t just be your mentors. You will start to find your new friends, the real people who were meant to be in your life. Your conversations will be natural and will last for hours. You’ll do everything together and will wonder how you ever sat through a mentally draining conversation through all of those years.

Yes, you had great times, but these new times are even better. They’re full of substance and depth. Everything will be authentic with these new people you’ll meet. And I know you’re thinking, “how will I meet these new people?” Trust me, when you cut the wrong people out of your life the right people begin to show up!

Successful people call this the law of attraction and I wholeheartedly agree with them. There’s this unwritten law that whatever you surround yourself with you’ll attract more of. Surround yourself with energy draining, negative, cynical people and you’ll just get more of that. But surround yourself with people who are wanting progress, growth, and a deeper meaning and connection in this life, and you’re most certainly going to get more of that. The people, places, events, circumstances, and opportunities will come in slow at first.. but eventually they’ll begin to show up in abundance!

The Results: Your Growth!

The decision is easy, the journey is not but it’s all worth it. Would you stick to your choice to cut off the negative people from your life if you could live a life that most could never dream of? If I told you that you would blossom into the person that you always wanted to be, and all you had to do was make a choice and stick to it, would you do it? Of course you would! You and I are cut from a different cloth. The simple fact that you’ve read this far goes to show how much you care about your personal growth, and for that I commend you.

You’re going to see that it is all worth it. The people that you once called friends, the past relationships, and the previous circumstances you were in were all temporary necessaries that contributed to who you are going to become. The road is going to be tough, lonely, sad and hard. You’re going to cry, you’re going to want to quit, but if you follow through, you’re going to be successful in all of the areas of life you always desired possible.

Understand this: not everyone in your life that is good to you is good for you. Once you ingrain this philosophy into your mind, you will make better choices and as a result your life will be different for the better.

The seed of your life has already been planted, and you’re going through the dirt to get to the surface. Will you make the decision and grow into a mighty oak or will you remain dormant and let your potential whither away? That’s between you and your intuition to discuss.

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